feelings pour

Some days ago, I was feeling tense with all the work I’m occupied with. I was quite down when I heard a shriek of a paranoid young lady. I’ll call her N.A. The shriek got louder when she ran into my room begging for help. No one in my room took much notice of her because it was just a cockroach. She went back into her room and seconds later, back into my room. This time, I helped her. “It is so big! As if it has lived for five years!” I was determined to see what my rival is made of. I was astonished that the five-year old insect is only 1.5cm long, when I thought it should be at least 4cm. I am still puzzled of how N.A judged the insect to be an adult cockroach when the real one has not even developed wings! Anyway, if any of you, readers are wondering, I did take a look at my ruler before I wrote this.

Many of my classmates are not really satisfied that most of our classes are in the afternoon. I have not much comment on that because it is quite convenient for me as I wake up quite late in the morning lately. I think it is because I always stay up late at night. Last Sunday, I woke up to see it was already 1.15pm. So, to avoid that during weekdays, I tried to go to bed a bit earlier at least. Going to bed does not mean sleep. What I mean is that I pretend to be sleeping and I only did fall asleep when it was near 3am. Maybe this problem is due to the Nescafe I had around 4pm every day. Maybe the fact that nothing has much biological effect on my body is true. The caffeine only has it effect on me hours later. P/s: I did not look at my watch to write this.

My classmates and I learned about the harmonics in Physics and students were to take examples of application of harmonics in some musical instruments. After I learnt this, then I know that harmonics are special. The harmonics on a violin are also special. I don’t know whether the two harmonics here are the same or not but both are different in their respective cases. Like a guitar, to produce different pitch of sound on the violin, fingers have to be placed firmly on different positions on the strings before you stroke the strings. But if you want to play the harmonic sounds on a violin, you don’t need to press onto the strings firmly but just touch gently the spot on the strings. I had wondered why before but I never knew and after long, I just let the facts be. Now, I’m confusing myself when I tried to relate the harmonics in physics with those on the violin.

I used to take music lessons a couple of years ago. I was quite disappointed that I started to play music when I was 15. My little sister is also playing the violin but she was not as old as I was when she started. I’m not very good in it but I really want to be. At first, I practiced for hours every day and when I realized I was overdoing it a bit, I gradually decrease the time I allocated for practicing. Eventually, my sister and I only practiced on weekends. My big sister plays the electone and she loves to play it to the loudest possible volume that the music can be heard over a couple of blocks in the neighbourhood. If she didn’t stop learning, I bet she would have been a professional player by now. I am so sad that she did even that she had to. What is sadder is that I am worse than she is. I only passed Grade 3 when I was 17 and I only learn my fourth till June of 2008. Now I have completely stop learning. There’s no doubt about me being jealous of my little sister because she has surpassed me! She can’t find a reason why she had to take the Grade 5 exam so she didn’t. I was shocked to hear this because I would do almost anything to take it. Exam fees? I don’t mind spending a few hundred for it when I have spent thousands. It’s not that I was rich or I was not fond in money. It’s just one way to get something you love more.

My family kept cats since I was very little. When the cats died, we just dispose the dead cats the easy way because there were too many of them. This is the only way me and my sisters got rid of dead cats till one time. We have a very terrible and extremely evil neighbour back in Alor Star. One of my favourite cats died on the road between my house and my neighbour’s. I can tell very well that something had run over him. I am almost 100% sure that the evil neighbour ran over him. My family never complained much about all the horrible things they did. I can only curse from afar. When I found my dead cat, I was hurt and angry instead of being really sad. I carried the heavy stinking body on a hoe to the backyard. Determined, I dug a hole deep enough for a dead cat even though the ground was very hard and difficult to be penetrated. I was the first in my family to bury any dead cats. At that time, I was hurt so much that I dug and dug without stopping till the hole got deep. Sweats dripped heavily that they trickled non-stop to the ground. Cats might be common creatures that people always see everywhere but they have made a lot of memories in my family’s life. I was compelled to write this because the event still hurts me. From that day on, I made sure that all of our dead cats be buried the proper way. Now, my backyard is a cemetery.